“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven.” — Ecclesiastes
Just like the seasons changing, Kyle Schwarber seems to again be heating up at the plate, as he is known to do each June. His recent batting average and home run statistics are impressive, mirroring his feline namesake, Kyla’s, fearless summer exploration as she travels weekly across states.
While Kyle and Kyla may share a birthday and a love of power hitting, their summer approaches are decidedly different. Kyle brings the thunder, while Kyla brings the purrfect blend of clever cuteness and chaos.
So this Monday, let’s draw inspiration from their pursuit of excellence. Whether you’re crushing goals at work or exploring new hobbies, remember to find your own summer wins and celebrate them!
| Category | Kyle “Schwarby” Schwarber | Kyla Josette SchwarPURR |
|---|---|---|
| Species | Homo sapien | Felis catus (domestic cat) |
| Nicknames | Kyle the Schwarbarian, Schwarbs | Kyla Kitty, FTTubs |
| Height | 6 ft 0 in (1.83 m) | 10 in (25 cm) (at the shoulder) |
| Weight | 240 lb (109 kg) | 16 lb (35.2 kg) (That’s one hefty meow!) |
| Weapon of Choice | Baseball bat | Razor-sharp claws (retractable for maximum surprise) |
| Preferred Dining | Plate piled high with pasta | Kitty treats (with a side of chin scratches) |
| Batting Average | .308, HomeRuns 23 (not bad for a guy who swings for the fences) | States Visited: 2, Balcony Birdwatching Victories: Countless (100% success rate at knocking over unsuspecting household items,) |
| Favorite Toy | Baseball | Anything that crinkles or dangles (feathers are a particular weakness) |
| Hunting Style | Crushes baseballs into oblivion | Stalks unsuspecting prey (red dots, dangling string, your unsuspecting ankles) |
| Post-Home Run Celebration | Epic bat flip | Dramatic tail swish and a regal meow |
| Lovability | Off the charts | Questionable (but who can resist that adorable little face?) |
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